Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Firsts

Seventeen years ago, I met you.
Your eyes were bold and blue.
You gazed up at me,
and I gasped,
not having any idea what I'd need to do.

I remember your tiny fingers as they coiled around mine,
reassuring me you'd be there and I'd do just fine.
You murmured a lullaby for only me to hear,
And my heart thrummed
in your gentleness, oh so kind.

Once the room was empty, all your visitors gone,
you reached up and brushed my face, the first sign of our true bond.
You knew me. You really knew me.
And in that moment I was sure,
through all of life's storms, you would always be my light, my dawn.

Seventeen years ago I met you,
and everything was so new.
I wanted to protect you,
spare you from life's hardships.
So I prayed for God to shield you, keep you happy, never blue.

I snuggled you closer, promising to do my best.
And you captured me in your blue eyes again, giving me rest.
You yawned, and
I laughed out loud.
Then I vowed to give all for you, nothing lest.

So seventeen years ago today, I became a mommy for the first time.
I remember every moment, every turn on a dime.
Those memories were not for you, but to strengthen me, to be what you'd need then, now and tomorrow...always free.
They bled into my heart, changing me like a rhythmic chime.

They are locked away in my heart forever, ready to share with you.
For a mother's heart never forgets, but that I think you always knew.
SA Larsen   

When we think of getting older, some people see retiring on the lake front in a cottage they've dreamed of building. Or some see it as a new door opening where traveling the world is possible. Regardless of what you imagine, take the time each day to retire, each day to dream.

My oldest turned seventeen yesterday. 17. I know lots of people say things like 'Can't believe how fast time flies' or 'Geez, it was just like yesterday'. But you know what? They're correct.

I barely survived the war of birthing Josh after 38 1/2 (yes I'm adding the 1/2) hours of labor, utterly confused and terrified. I had no idea what was going on and I was sure I was dying. It didn't help that Doc. Dingous was talking during my contractions about going golfing when this was over.  Um, dude, this was me practically going mad. Butthead.

So I simply wanted to wish Josh a happy birthday. I can't believe he has one summer left with us and then he'll be on his way, starting his own life. My door is always open, honey. I <3 you.

(Still on vacation. Heading to Six Flags, today. Hope your week is going well.)

9 comments:

  1. It does go by too fast.

    38 1/2 hours - you're a superstar. If our doctors gave birth, they know how overwhelming it was for us, even if it's another day at the office for them.

    What a sweet poem and post.

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  2. Those early moments with a new baby are gifts. Happy birthday to your boy.

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  3. How beautiful!!! Happy 17th Josh!

    My oldest just turned 16. It makes me both happy and a little sad. I can't believe they grow up so fast.

    Have a great time at Six Flags!

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  4. What a loser doctor. Happy birthday, Josh!

    That was a beautiful poem.

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  5. happy birthday to Josh, and have a blast at 6 flags; maybe ride the rollercoaster for me. It was always my fav.

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  6. So sweet!

    And a very good argument for why only female doctors should be allowed to deliver children. :)

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  7. AWWW! Happy birthday!!! I was in labor 2 1/2 days, so I feel your pain BIG TIME.

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  8. I can't believe you have a child that's 17. You look too young for that.You should start passing on all your advice on the teenage years. My daughter is only 13.

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  9. wow. what an incredible post.

    thanks so much for sharing.

    i hope you have an amazing vacation :D

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