IWSG: The Month Before Your 1st Book Baby Releases...EEK!

There's nothing like support, right? Of course. We all need it sometimes. No matter what where you live, what you do, or what's going on in your life there is always something to stress about. And that's okay. As long as we don't let it rule us.
So I've got this thing happening in just over a month. Yeah, my first book baby will be released. I ask your forgiveness now for all my book yammering you'll hear over the next six to eight weeks. Needless to say, the closer my release date gets the more stress presses on me. I figured if I could use a laugh or two so could you. 
                      This is me right now:  via GIPHY
And this: 
via GIPHY

But I promise you, I'll be like this soon and so will you!
via GIPHY

HUGS from a fellow insecure writer... <3

IWSG~Winter Blues Making You Crazy?

More Participants Found HERE & a special
'thank you' to this meme's hosts 
Christine Rains, C. Lee McKenzie, and Tara Tyler. 

We all suffer from the winter blahs. The months of February and March drag on like a lame dog doing the dead-man's crawl across the Sahara Desert uphill both ways. 
Here in Maine, it's like endless gray. Lifeless. Dull. Wet. Gloomy. Filthy. And there's sand. And salt. 
Did I mention salt? The stuff that eats your car, scratches your interior floors, and stains everything white! Like we don't have enough white with the snow.
So what's a person to do? 

• Look on the bright side - close your eyes and picture a candle ... lit.

• Find the rainbow in the clouds - buy a colorful skein of yard, cut pieces into strands, and braid. Shoelaces work, too.

• See the glass half full - fill a tall glass halfway with water and then pour that into a smaller glass. If you use wine ... drink.

• Just smile - use red lipstick and a cutout of the Joker's mouth. Trace and bare it. No lipstick? See #3 above, only use a large rimmed glass and milk ... drink. Honestly, this one will probably make you laugh. 

• Count your blessings - collect all the out-of-place belongings others who live in your house NEVER take care of (plates, silverware, socks, underwear included), stuff into garbage bags, and store in a private place only you know about. When they discover their missing items, go to your private place, stare at the bags and laugh. I honestly have done this and it made me feel better.

If all that fails move to St Martin or someplace warmer. 
Any good cliches to add to my list of snark? The purpose of the IWSG is to share and encourage, posting on the first Wednesday of each month. You'll find writer doubts and concerns without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Support and a common understanding spread throughout the group as many fellow writers can relate. Feel free to JOIN in anytime.

The Zest & Zeal of Motherhood ~ A to Z Challenge

My A to Z Challenge.  What I'm doing: OFF the CUFF ~ Basically, I'll be keeping posts short and writing about whatever moves me~themes, inspirations, causes, and silliness. I'll stick to my normal posting of Mondays & Wednesdays (possibly an occasional other day), highlighting the appropriate letter for said day. But I will visit blogs throughout the week. I am looking forward to reading your words!

So I thought I'd exit this year's A to Z Challenge with some ZESTY humor to show you that my almost twenty-one-years of motherhood has not stolen all my ZEAL. 

First up ~ The Angst of the Toilet Seat *** Set the scene: We only have three kids ages 7, 3, & 1 at the time. I'm putting 1-year-old for a nap and hear a bellow from the half bathroom. #2nd child--who's head is still too dang big for his short body--was on the toilet and leaned forward to play with his huge firetruck that he brought into the bathroom with him. His gigantic head was too heavy for him to hold up, and its weight pulled him towards the floor. Only ... um ... his 'thingy' got stuck between the toilet seat and the porcelain, stretching the freaking thing out. You should have seen it. It was bleeding, black and blue, and ... OMGosh ... try explaining that one to your pediatrician. (NOTE: Luckily for us, our pediatrician knew our 2nd child well. His mischievousness had already gotten him into so much physical trouble, he was a regular in her office. I could write a book about him alone. We dubbed him Denis the Menace.)

Second for today ~ High Aspirations  *** Mom: "What do you want to be when you grow up?" 4th child/10yr-old: "I want to be the forty-year-old creeper in the basement designing video games and living off YouTube."

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Lastly ~ Youngest Child's Broadened Mind *** Set the scene: I'm in the kitchen preparing dinner. The time is during the last presidential race. A political commercial airs. It's message is encouraging voters to head out to the polls to vote.  4th Child: Mom? Mom: What? 4th Child: Are those polls like stripper poles? 

I have many, many more Sherisms to share with you from my twenty years of motherhood. So stay tuned! It's been a pleasure sharing this year's A to Z Challenge with you. 
Until next time .... Have any interesting stories either you or your kiddos have done? 

I do have one other surprise for today, although it doesn't have to do with the A to Z. Those who know me know I LUV supporting my fellow author. A while back, I released a review for KEEP YOU FROM HARM by the talented Debra Doxer. Today is her cover release day for book II in the series. I just had to share for her. 

ADD to your GOODREADS

To Have and to Harm (The Remedy Series) by Author Debra Doxer  Cover Design: Okay Creations  Release Day: JUNE 10TH 
 About the Book: She kept everyone from harm, except herself… Raielle’s life was shrouded in secrets. Her power was a secret and so was her past. When she came to Fort Upton, everything changed. She discovered her family, and she found the boy who would own her heart forever. But it couldn’t last. Knowing so little about her power nearly destroyed her. She had to leave and break both their hearts.
Now she’s back in California, and she doesn’t have to hide who she is anymore. But there is no relief in that because she’s drowning in regret. She knew it would take a miracle or a sin to save her, and there was no miracle. Her survival came at too high a price. She found her father, but she can’t go back to Lucas until she finds redemption. 
 She saved him. Then she left him… 
She came out of nowhere and changed him forever, then she disappeared and left him reeling. Her whole life, she never had anyone who really loved her. Until him. Did she think he wouldn’t come for her? Did she believe she wasn’t worth it? 
 Lucas leaves everything behind to follow Raielle. When he finds her, she’s a pale shadow of the girl he remembers. Her power is betraying her and so are the people around her, but one thing hasn’t changed. She selflessly wants to save the world, and he just wants to save her. 
With more secrets to uncover and dark truths to face, Raielle and Lucas must make sacrifices to be together again. But in the end, will those sacrifices bring them closer together or tear them apart? When he’s forced to make the ultimate sacrifice, will she turn her back on everything she believes in to save him again? 
~ This book is intended for mature readers due to sexual situations and strong language. ~ 
 And now, what you’ve all been waiting for!!! Debra is give away a signed set of her Remedy Series! Enter here: a Rafflecopter giveaway

Car Wash FEAR

My A to Z Challenge.  What I'm doing: OFF the CUFF ~ Basically, I'll be keeping posts short and writing about whatever moves me~themes, inspirations, causes, and silliness. I'll stick to my normal posting of Mondays & Wednesdays (possibly an occasional other day), highlighting the appropriate letter for said day. But I will visit blogs throughout the week. I am looking forward to reading your words!
Fear is a word that can paralyze, demoralize, and rob us of motivation to work, live, and play. But today, I'm going to keep it light and share with you one of my quirky fears - CAR WASHES.
I don't know if it's being trapped in a car stuck in neutral that's being covered in suds or those material wipey-things that slink up the windshield, but I am terrified of car washes. I literally shake when my husband decides to spontaneously pull into one of these places.
I mean, just look at these images. Going in there would be like being the girl in a horror movie who hears shrills and raw splattering on the walls just ahead of her but still goes down the hallway to peek. 

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And what the heck is this one? With my luck, the mechanical stuff would come to life like in that Stephen King movie where all the appliances kill the people. Nope. I'm good.

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What about you? Do you have a fear people think are silly?

The X-Factor of Motherhood

There's nothing like those first few days after you realize you're in love. Euphoria takes over, and even a bit of foolish stupidity on occasion. But it's all in the name of the human dating-committing-mating process.

A young couple then marries and begins to map out what they see as their future together. For some, this includes children. Ah...procreation. Passing on the genes. Extending the family tree. Fatherhood. And Motherhood, which brings on the X-factor of being a mom.

Here's how to know if you (or your significant other) have the X-Factor of Motherhood.

1. Shower time is cut in half, because you're always in a hurry now. Shaving your legs really isn't that important.
2. No more manicures. Shorter nails are safer to avoid getting poop, finger paints, or creamy foods like peanut butter crammed under your fingernails.
3. Late night begins at 8:30 PM instead of 1:00 AM.
4. Going to the bathroom becomes a family affair. You can't even get 30 seconds free to pee ... ALONE.
5. You trade in your hot-chick muscle car for the dreaded minivan. 
6. Your favorite song to sing with the kids has to do with playgrounds and buses instead of beer, partying ALL NIGHT LONG, and hating your parents.
7. You begin to appreciate your  parents.
8. Your idea of a hot date is flannel PJs, a good book, while your hubby snores next to you.
9. Eating out means fast food, while racing the kids to their activities.
10. My favorite - you learn to be grateful for silence. Ah......

Feel free to add more! Can you relate?

My daughter and I are in a show this weekend, three showings to be exact. Hopefully I can get some photos and video to share with you. I'll probably need Monday to recover, so see you on Tuesday!! HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!!

Featherbrained Friday: More like Feather-FRIED

Here's a little comedy to get you into the weekend mood.

The Google Search Keywords someone on this planet used; yes, to find me.

• faces on eggs - (Subliminal message, maybe?)
• dr. seuss character boot - (Wow! Writers are a tough crowd. They only use a cane to yank you off the stage in the theater, not kick you.)
• blue demon - (Oh yah! I have a wrestling name. GO MOM!)
• fitness competition events for women over 40 - (Clearly, they were looking for someone else. I've been 29 for 11 years now. Duh.)
• my puberty journal - (Um, I know I chat up MG along with YA here, but there will be no health class lessons in the Alleyway. Just saying....)
• aka ally X - (This is a KidLit site, folks, just a KitLit site.)

Have you ever looked at your Google Search Keywords? 

Sidenote: I completely spaced that next week is school vacation week. I'll be taking the week off from blogging, except for Thursday when I highlight a fabulous YA author and two of her characters. If you don't blog on Thursdays, please stop by on Friday to give her some Alleyway support. Merci!!

So, just because I like weird and strange stuff, and people who are obviously bored, I'm sharing this video with you. I could not stop laughing.

Cat Jump Fail - watch more funny videos

Happy Weekend!!

WELL, I Never....

Normally, I don't blog on Thursdays, but I could not resist playing this little game. And with Vicki Rocho, no doubt. My measly brain is supposed to come up with a few lines about something I'd never do, never think of doing, and/or do not understand. Now, I could chatter on about some of the ideas the crept into my mind like sky diving, using mousse instead of hair gel, or becoming a contestant on X-Factor--the one where the players eat really gross stuff.

But I won't. To scary, and I haven't had breakfast yet.

But there is one thing, and it's a beauty aid mind you, that I simply DO NOT understand, would never do or think of doing.

Body Piercing.

I'm not talking about your average ear, navel, or wherever (slamming eyelids shut) piercing. I'm referring to those native traditions we've all seen on the Discovery or the History Channel. Use your imagination. You know what I'm talking about: 

• a plate in the bottom lip
• a rock or some cylindrical object in the earlobe
• a stick you-know-where with twine folding the little sucker up toward the torso.

Yeah. I'm shivering, too.

There have it. My WELL, I NEVER.... For more, check out the other participants HERE!!

Featherbrained Friday: Toilet Paper

Ready for another edition of Featherbrained Friday? Well, I have a humorous story for you, one that is very close to my home.

Jake twirls the football in the air over his head and catches it in his fourteen-year-old hands.

"Pass it here. Pass it here," cries CJ, Jake's little brother.

Jake hauls his arm backward, the ball in his grip, his shoulder tensing. CJ's eyes widen and he crouches. A smile lifts his tiny cheeks.

Thrusting his arm forward, Jake throws the football. CJ raises his lanky arms, fingers long and stretching towards the ceiling. Big sister Kate cups her hands around her mouth, giving the whoosh of their make believe crowd life.

The ball spirals and flies over the coffee table. CJ reaches a bit more. A small moan vibrates up his throat. Tiny lines crease his forehead. Then the ball thuds him in the chest, knocking the wind out of him.

"Nice one, moron," Kate says to Jake as she ambles over to CJ to give him a comforting hug.

Jake chuckles. "It's not my fault he missed."

"He's seven." Kate beams the ball at Jake's face. He dodges its path and sticks out his tongue.

"Real mature."

CJ pinches his nose between his fingers, as Kate walks out of the living room. "Hey, who cut one?"

"If you smelt it then you dealt it." Jake bends over to pick up the ball.

"I did not," CJ screams. "You're always blaming me for stuff!"

"Augh,"--Jake points at the ball on the carpet--"maybe you didn't do it, little bro."

CJ leans forward. "Ooh, the dog pooped in the house. Mom's goin'a be mad."

"Yeah," Jake answers. "So why don't you make like a good little brother. Get some toilet paper and get rid of it. We can finish playing pass outside." Jake jogs toward the mudroom.

"'K," little CJ says, really excited to play football with his big brother outside.

#

An hour later, Mom and Dad arrive home from an open house at the local high school. Dad shuts the driver's side door to his car, as Mom leans by his side.

"You want to guess who did that?" Mom asks. They both laugh.

"Hey, since when do the trees need toilet paper?" Dad nonchalantly asks.

...toilet paper & doggy @#$% dangling from the hedges in the yard...

NICE. The neighbors just love us. Got to love the care of an older sibling.

Have a fabulous weekend, Alleywalkers!!

Worst Movies Ev'ah Blogfest!!

As I've stated in the past, I'm a blogger who tends to shy away from blogfests. But every-so-often, I'll come across one that I just have to partake in. So this post must be credited to the genius that is Alex Cavanaugh and his gathering of the Worst Movies Ever!!

My stab at this list will incorporate reasons the movie didn't work, in my opinion, and how writers can utilize these lessons to improve their writing.

1. Showgirls - Question: was there even a plot??
Writers - Make sure you have a plot.

2. Year One - I'm all for a laugh, or two, or three. But you have to actually be funny.
Writers - If you plan on using humor throughout a storyline or to develop a character, please be funny.

3. The American - this story went on and on and on about absolutely nothing. I just didn't get it. He's making a gun. Who gives a rat's ars! What else do you have?
Writers - Have a point.

4. Max Payne - everything seemed to take forever in this film. I think I nodded off, too.
Writers - Pace is very important. If you slow the pace down, have a vital reason.

5. White Chicks - I just couldn't get past the makeup!! Sorry. I didn't seem plausible to me.
Writers - if you have an idea that is unique but a bit out there, make sure you can make it work before wasting your time writing it. IMHO, an idea--no matter how farfetched--can be made to work with enough thought, preparation, and care.

6. The Happening - flat and pointless, almost generic.
Writers - If you want to take an old, bland idea and write about it, toss in something new to spice it up or it will fall flat.

7. April Fool's Day ('80s) - At the end of the movie, the viewers realize it's all been a joke.
Writers - Know that you have an intelligent audience. Don't treat them like idiots. 

8. Garbage Pail Kids - Yeah, some movies just should never have been made.
Writers - Think if it's a story worth telling.

9. Vanilla Ice/Cool as Ice - Can you say lame characters? (Along with plot, theme, scenes, etc...)
Writers - The success to a great story is characters who are developed deeply and in an interesting way.

10. Couples Retreat - Now this one is a bit more personal. Being the parents of four children lends my hubby and me little time to ourselves. This movie gave me hope--a lingering Ahh... of expectation and led me to believe that the story-line(s) would relate to me and my life. A good laugh... It failed.
Writers - if you write a killer blurb for your book and market the @#%^& out of it, making promises of awesomeness, then you'd better come through.

So there you have my summary. For more Worst Movies featured today, go HERE!! I'm sure you'll recognize a few.

Featherbrained Friday!!

I decided that it was time to dip into my silly side, show you that I can be the life of the party. It's been long enough--almost a year and a half of blogging our courtship. So I've come up with a new regular post, where I'll highlight anything silly, outrageous, or just plain stupid that I come across~~yes, probably exposing my deep, dark, family secrets; but it's all in fun, right? Might find some silly in my town, on television, or floating within the blogosphere--can't imagine that one. ;D

I'm sure most of you guys won't give two chips about this, but ladies...really?

I wonder how many cotton balls it takes to fill up this suit?

Close your eyes....

I warned you....

(How stupid!)

And for my favorite one....

QUICK!! Someone run and get a True Blood vampire!

Looks like bambis' going to need some!

(Note to store clerks: change the display when you change the movie!!)

Any featherbrained events happen in your neck of the woods this week? Observe something really foolish? Share!!

My Take on Back-2-School Writing

Where I live, newly-incoming high school freshman and junior high sixth graders, along with the elementary kids officially begin their school year one day before the rest of the students. So that put my family in a funky position--child #2 (an incoming freshman) and my 2nd grader attended school yesterday, leaving my senior and 7th grader starting today. Topping it all off, Hurricane Irene pushed them back an extra day.


Regardless...
...can you hear the quiet at my house? Ahh...

In honor of all this quiet, I put together a silly writers' list of "ables" and "not-so-ables"--how I'll utilize my time.

On the first Back To School day, I'll finally be able to: turn my computer on without hearing "Mom, he hit me! Mom, she ate all the cereal. Mom, Mom, Mom..."

On the second Back To School day, I'll finally be able to: drink my coffee warm without microwaving it 8 million times.

On the third Back To School day, I'll come back to reality: turn the computer off and fill out all the ($%^&@#$%) paper work the school insists on sending home, despite living in the digital age. (Save a tree, already.)

On the fourth Back To School day, I'll have no choice but to: rest my aching hands from filling out those forms on day three.

On the fifth Back To School day, I'll finally be able to: peek at my outline for my YA story, then rush to the athletic meetings for Fall sports--the ones, because I have four kids, I've already attended in the past 10x!

On the sixth Back To School day, I'll finally be able to: W--R--I--I--I--T--E. *pom-pom cheers 4 me*

On the seventh Back To School day, I'll be forced to: trudge through the elementary, junior high, and high school, attending yet my umpteenth OPEN HOUSE!


On the eighth Back To School day, I'll be forced to: pick up kids at three different schools, attend a X-country meet and girls' soccer practice, and explain (again) to my 2nd grader why he can't play Xbox in school.

On the ninth Back To School day, I'll finally break: and decide to write a letter to the editor of our local newspaper stating:  ***There should be a reprieve from paper work and lame meeting attendance for parents with multiple children.***


On the tenth Back To School day, I'll finally be able to: see hope and gain my bearings.

On the eleventh Back To School day, I'll finally be able to: begin to adjust, seeing my writing time renewed. Characters will inspire me, new scenes will flood my brain. I'll crack my knuckles and exhale.

And on the twentieth Back To School day, I'll be able to say: "A new school year for them and a new writing season for me. And this is my year!"


What about you? Can you see the light through all the fallen trees that block your writing road?

Mommy Slash Writer's X-Mas List

SPLATTER NOTICE:  For the first time since I began blogging almost eleven months ago, I have decided to unplug--no personal blogging or posts--from December 24th until January 3rd. I will miss you all terribly. My GUT tells me (& the awesomeest Shannon Whitney Messenger knows what I mean), that the new year will bring a new and busy adventure for me where I won't be able to spend as much time with my family. You'll probably get sick of me. LOL

My family and I celebrate Christmas in the true Reason for the Season. It's one of the most grounding times during our year. We come together, eat (& yes, drink), sit by the fire, share our thoughts of the past year and our hopes and dreams for new one before us. MERRY CHRISTMAS. Have a safe and joyous HOLIDAY with yours and yours alike. You are in my thoughts. I appreciate each one of you. Thank you for sharing yourselves with me.

I plan on sharing a post-Christmas story with you about our decorations, traditions, and of course tons of photos!

So in my true skin, I've chosen to share a bit of SherriE humor, from the motherly perspective. BY ALL MEANS, Moms out there, add to my declaration.

"All I want to Christmas is..."


I'm sure you have as many realistic ending phrases for that song as far fetched ones. I know I do. So in a Merry'ole gesture of Tis'the Season, I thought I'd share a few of my motherly desires to increase my writing time.

~ A Laundry Machine: you read that correctly. A laundry machine, not a washer and dryer. I want the whole kit-kat-and coboodle. I want a machine that sorts, washes--and softens, of course--dries, and folds. But not only that! I want it to walk each kid's piles of clothing into their rooms and put the stinking stuff away! In every draw, shelf, and on every hanger. (This would not only afford me an extra three hours a day for writing, but save on glasses of wine at the end of said day.) 


~ An Instant Snack Generator: sure, like the one the Jetsons had. Why not? Picture the little food gorgers piling off the bus, now. Sweet! No more handmade pb&j crackers (at least not by these hands), or cut up fresh fruit. No, their most coveted snacks to appease their grumbling bellies would be at the simple tip of their grubby fingers. 'Course, in my house, they'd break the off button on the machine which would create the never-ending food line, not to mention a sticky mess. But at least I wouldn't run out of food to supply the neighborhood kids who seem to think our kitchen is a grocery store.

~ eReader embedded in my head while I'm beta reading or critiquing others' work. Now there's a real reason for an eReader. Heck, yeah. My eyes tend to be crossing all the time, seeing how I read so much. This could come with an automatic backup, frequent word finder, and maybe even stimulate the coffee maker to perk on its own. (Side effects may include frequent eye blinking, nausea, piercing migraines, as well as forgetfulness when device is not in use. Due to the large amount of energy needed to run said device, all other aspects of your life may be inhibited to the point of death...but said device may be extracted and re-implanted in a family member with the same blood type.)

Psst...DON'T read the fine print. Really, who does that??

~ Self-gassed-up vehicle: no more stops at the gas station? This would eliminate the extra writing hour a week I waste listening to at least one of the kids hymn and haw how they 'Need a drink RIGHT NOW!' only because I don't have a water faucet with me. Grr...there goes MOM, into the store to buy water, Gatorade, soda, whatever it will take to keep that kid quiet.

~ Email comptroller: OMGosh...I am the worst at controlling my emails. I probably spend 4 to 6 hours weekly, answering or just reading emails filled with response-needs, articles (which I asked for), or messages from the kids teachers/coaches about scheduling, homework, etc... I want a little dude living in MY cyberspace who reads, collates, and answers emails for me but relays all info directly into my brain. There. An invisible personal assistance who doesn't get paid or fed, and mostly DOESN'T COMPLAIN!

Now please, my precious', can you add to my list?? Dad's are included, too!

Lil'Devil Turns 14

He crawls on hands and knees, quietly casing the room. The door closes behind him, left just ajar...just in case. Slowly, he stalks the crib, knowing what lies inside. The smell, the softness, the lull of each baby breath lures him nearer. A plush stuffed elephant catches his eyes. The gray color is just as he remembers it, one ear flapping over. Reaching for it, he flicks the trunk and grunts, irritated. It's all too familiar. He presses on.

The wood of the crib is solid. A stable place for a babe to lay her head...one would think. His stubby fingers cling to one post. He pulls himself to stand just enough to see the snuggled image before him. The wave off his eyelashes is faint, but his blue eyes sparkle, deviously ready to strike. His thick lips pull into a grin. His tongue rolls out like a shade, draping over his bottom lip. He sputters. Saliva pools in his mouth. Speckles of spit pepper his cheeks and outstretched arm. Excited, he accidentally shakes the crib. The teeny lump under the blanket stirs. He squawks. And to his delight, the baby cries.

Out of nowhere, long slender fingers attached to strong hands lift him off the carpet. His chubby legs dangle in midair, the scintillating blue of his eyes now fading to a pale fear as they peer into the unexpected abyss of Mommy's big, scary, and angry blue eyes.

Oops, she caught me waking up baby sissy, Kate. Crud, Jake thinks as Mommy's lips flutter up and down, saying words he doesn't understand...but he just heard earlier this morning.

Did I get'chya???

Summer '10

We celebrated child #2's 14th Birthday yesterday. It's still amazing to me that he's grown so old. He came into this world at 2:02 in the morning like a lion and has never stopped roaring. He's full of life and ambition, and has a loyal heart just like his dad. As much as he's tested me, he's made me laugh...and made me proud.

So here's a flashback of my devious little boy.

Can U C it in his eyes?

Big brother Josh giving advice, "Mom said
'No touch, Jakie.'"

Caught again...

OH, yes, she see's me...I'm
touching it anyway.

Does she see me?

Did mommy say to stop jumping
on this book that makes noise or 
jump more?? I'll go for more...

IT's hard to make his b-day special. 
Always feels like we rush it, being six
days before Christmas.


I wanted him to know that every moment
he's given us has been noticed, and yes...
ARCHIVED! *Mom winks, thinking of
senior video material in five years because
he's given Mom plenty.*

HAPPY 14th BIRTHDAY to my Magical, Mystical, Mischievous boy who lights up everyday with his grin cocked to the side, his challenging glares, and his teasing taunts. Oh yeah, and thanks for all my gray hairs!

Love Mom.

So tell me. Do any of you have children or close relations with birthdays close to a holiday? How do you manage to make it special?

Greedy Little Writers

I don't know about you, but I can official mark this holiday pre-season with the seal of FAIL. I am usually totally prepared. Honestly, Thanksgiving weekend is my Christmas decorating and wrapping time. This year I've been late with both.
My kids are getting older. I'm not sure if their age is what's robbing the spunk out of gift giving this season or the fact that one of their wanted items ranges anywhere from $200 to $1,000. Yeah, we're talking iPods, iPads, laptops, xBox360, PS3, small flat screens, and don't get me started on clothes. A pair of jeans for my seven year old should not cost $36 bucks. I'm sorry. He'll outgrow the stupid denim in two months.

AND my seventeen year old wears men's sizes, which is a great feat when it comes to new hockey skates. The model youth size he wore costs about $250 a pair. That same model in men's sizes costs $600. Then it's $200 for a new hockey stick--and in high school they break them...A LOT.  For you with little ones, just more reasons to bottle them up and keep them sweet and innocent.

So--and today is...what's the date???--the hubs and I still have no idea what we're getting the older three (Josh 17, Jake 14, Kate 12). CJ (7yr) is easier, not easy though. Having older siblings gives him an older mentality. He wants two xbox games at $70 a pop, a new bike, a laptop, and yeah, his own TV in his room. (NOT)


But all this got me to thinking about writing, like pretty much everything else in my life now. What about writer's gifts?? Well, I've put together a little list of Writer Have Want Gifts and Places That Have Them for you.

1) New laptop - Just Google that one. There were a million different sites and they are so user friendly. Plus, this cybertard got dizzy.

2) Magnets for inspiration. You can pick up with one at CafePress.

3) Mugs are great gifts. Like this one. It reads: WRITER ~ someone who gets paid to sit around all day drinking coffee and make stuff up.






4) What about a thinking cap?







5) There's always the mind-scrambling notepad to jot down your fantabulastic idea.








I hope this was helpful. Hey, why don't you print it out and give it to those wondering what a writer would like.

Even better, give it to your non-writer friends. HO-HO-HO-BACKSPACE....

YOU Have to Read THIS!!

Newsflash!! Research of a Wannabe Writer at the Bon Jovi Concert

Friday afternoon, four hot mommies, aka flamin' hotties from an earlier era, gathered their umpteen bags, lush cooler filled with beer, wine, and um...purple stuff that was reeeallly good, and crackers after setting up their eleven kids between them with relatives, babysitters, and some strange guy who just offered, hauled @ss into a vehicle and soared over the roads of Maine, making their way to Foxboro, MA.

One, we'll call her 'The Princess', drove with her Coach shades shadowing her face and her blonde streaked hair flapping in the air conditioning. No open windows--it messes up the do. Her wing-girl--the maintenance-free, former-field-hockey-player-turned-coach--in the passenger seat read signs, guiding the foursomes' way.

The two ex-cheerleaders sat in the middle seats, one with her Droid permanently attached to her palm and the other--lost for words from leaving her laptop at home as instructed. Although her fingers were jittery and her stomach churning, she was able to overcome the urge to tackle her sidemate, rip her Droid from her hand, and start blogging. Proud moment.

Arrival at said destination didn't go as smoothly as planned. But once the girls found their hotel, they did what any 29-yr-old-forever pack of ladies would do: found food. Good gosh, you'd of thought they hadn't eaten since high school. (Well, seeing how most of them didn't eat much in high school, they were due.)

After ordering a bunch of yummy appetizers at the bar, the aim of their quest changed. Their 'adult thirst' needed quenching and what better then a stranger buying them a round of drinks. The four giggled like silly school girls again. Um, yeah, the alcohol had NOTHING to do with it, Mr.-nice-buying-them-drinks-guy.

Then of course the next feasible thing for them to do was pester the front desk, the bartender, the manager, and their waitress to see where the hot spots in town were. To their utter amazement--shock and horror, peeps--the local bowling alley, KING'S, turned into a bar after 10:30 p.m. With a disco ball.

With a disco ball. Yup...Nuf said.

As you can imagine this fed their happy-go-lucky-mommy-moods. I asked one of the ladies her opinion.


"Dang it! Are you kidding? How do you think we felt? No husbands. No kids. And we're in a town that doesn't have a decent bar!!"  the Droid owner threw up her hands, lavender-manicured fingernails matching nothing she wore.

Blondie aka 'Princess' gingerly tapped the manicured hand of the irate mommy. "I told you we should have stayed right in Boston. But no, you had to book our room here, in Dedham." She rolled her blue eyes like the eight ball missing the corner pocket.

After receiving a few seductive glares from the group of junior hockey players at the bar, the ladies trudged back to their room to make the most of the night.

And what did they do?

They took strange photos of their body parts and posted them on Facebook, luring their jealous friends back home into a guessing game. Whose toes are whose? They then used the same idea the next day while gathering at Cheers--the famous bar in Boston.

Whose drinks are whose? They had a bunch of old high school chums and townspeople duking it out on FB to declare a winner. The winner was awarded a cyber kiss which he ordered just the way he wanted it. To quote the hubs of the girl without her laptop, "Great I won. Now you all can kiss my cyber@ss!"

Reports flooded in about these luscious mommies and ran the gamut from sightings of them wandering the parking lot tailgating and singing karaoke, to meeting people from a nearby town in Maine in the potty line and swigging icy-cold pina coladas. But the most important bit of news is where they viewed the show. FROM THE BLESSED PIT, readers. Second row in the pit! Here's a few photos to prove it.

Yup, that's Kid Rock singing with Jon!

What a cutie...still.

#30

And to top it off, the band gave the first two rows in the PIT their chairs. These lovely, normally frustrated and overworked mommies were given Bon Jovi chairs to take home.

Yeah, I think the girls had a hell of a time.

This photo was captured by the athletic
mom as the ladies took yet another rest.

Oh, one minor detail I left out. Look at all the people that were left when the girls exited Foxboro Stadium.
I guess concerts are for the young at heart, not the aging body.

To this, the Droid addict mommy commented, "Reporter dude, those chairs were heavy!"

Though the band will never read this, major Hotheads go out to them for putting on an awesome show, and for giving these moms a much-deserved weekend and their new CHAIRS!! But rocker dudes, you really gave these lovelies something even more valuable.

Through the over-active use of the ex-cheerleaders Droid, these four were able to lead, include, and keep the most important people in their lives with them: the reason they do what they do each day--their families. These four ladies are thankful for the weekend, their friendship, and the people who shared their days with them.

Here's a bit of Kid Rock, if you're interested. But pwwease, you must SCROLL down to see something even better.




LISTEN to this som'n extrah...just for a bit. Here's a little video from the second row of the pit!! Try to ignore the girls' horrendous singing and listen to Jon Jon. But honestly, I think these ladies ROCKED Gillette Stadium just fine.